a March 2002 Her Domain Email List Thread.
YOU MIGHT BE
A TECH-HEAD IF:
- The local gas
station is selling DSL and you think "Wow...when did Conoco become
- You've got more
spare computer parts than credit cards.
- Your children
know how to install software before they know how to ride a bike.
- When you move,
you get your new place based on fitting five computers in one room.
- You call your
friends by their screen names when you see them in person.
- You buy a cell
phone so you can get email when you're away from your computer.
- You send your
kids email on their computers telling them it's time for dinner.
- When you've
been out and about in town all morning and have to pee really, really
bad, but when you reach home you check your email before you go to
- You double click
on images in your dreams to move to a new scene.
- You wish that
your house had a search engine.
- You're explaining
to someone about your situation and you say it like "I 're-booted'
my 19 yr old out of my house after she pushed the "Reset"
buttons on my brain's CPU."
- A memory upgrade
is no longer an option for your life...but you
actually considered it.
- Your friend
tells you they have a virus...and instead of asking them what the
doctor says, you ask them what pattern files or dat files they currently
- When you need
to cut costs, you cancel your phone service, leaving
your cable modem.
- A friend met
a his girlfriend in person at a bar and when explaining how they met,
you say, "He met her offline".
- You explain
how a guest room is like a temp tablespace for sorting out the rest
of the house (-must love database humor).
- Your friends
call you more often for tech support than moral support.
- You instant
message your roommate, instead of going upstairs to talk face to face.
- Your car's CD
player plays MP3s too.
- You belong to
a list-serv that sends out more than 50 emails a day...and you read
- You unconsciously
start to open files with the remote while watching TV.
- You buy and
sell most of your electronics and entertainment on eBay and never
go to garage sales anymore.
- Even your dog
has his own web site.
- You own a t-shirt
that says "No, I will not fix your computer", especially
for family gatherings.
- You send out
all your party invites by email and keep forgetting to invite the
friends who you would have to phone.
- You have no
more friends who don't have email.
- You judge the
coolness of your friends and acquaintances by their home computers'
processing power and operating systems.
- After buying
exclusively on-line for 3 years, you visit a bricks and mortar store
and buy $50 of assorted junk you don't need because you are mesmerized
by the 3 dimensional displays.
- You have a surge
protector on the house that protects the computer from a direct hit
from lightning. Your insurance agent points out that the house would
burn to the ground, but that's alright because you'd take the computer
out before anything else.
- Your boyfriend
knows you are serious when you store your backup CD at
- You are writing
a list, make a mistake, and automatically try to "UNDO".
- You can build
2 good computers from the spare parts in your closet, and still have
some left over.
- You find yourself
speaking in all acronyms.
- You try to CTRL+V
to paste a thought from your brain onto paper.
- Though you've
scorned yellow happy faces since their invention in the '60s, you
use emoticons like punctuation. . .even in hand-written notes.
- More than 90%
of your email is from listservs regarding computer technologies, and
you refuse to part with them because they are kind of like a security
- Your desktop
is so full of shortcut icons you have to arrange them in alphabetical
order to find the one you want.
- You have a "little
black book" full of passwords . . . all of them in use.
- You refer to
yourself as "cross-platform" when you mean you can drive
stick *and* automatic!
- You realize
that almost all your friends work in high-tech, and you refer to people
who don't work in high-tech as "normal."
- You find it
hard to come up with topics of conversation with someone who isn't
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